By Asra Aman
We have heard enormously that students attempt suicide in Chitral. But, unfortunately, after 46 suicidal attempts this year, we got another news regarding suicide but now the victim is not any student, it is a head teacher of a government school who hanged himself. I was definitely not the only Chitrali who is stunned by this news, there are so many others who have been shocked. A saying of David Haselkorn echoed mechanically in my head at the moment: “Teaching is the essential profession the one that makes all other professions possible.” If it comes to education a teacher is a responsible person in order to character building of the students. Moreover, it’s a teacher who is supposed to know the individual differences and psyche of their students. Parents are hopeful in terms of their children’s holistic development, while sending them towards educational institutes. Pause here for a moment and ask some questions from yourself. Who is responsible? What is the future of our children in this chaos of life and are such tragic incidents become icing on the cake for those students who are already suicidal thoughts? Why are people getting so impatient, anxious, and depressed day by day? What are the things that stop us to face our fears? Why are we losing faith in God? Why are we away from our religion and can’t be able to see other blessings of Him?Why don’t we remember hereafter though it’s undeniable fact?
As our religion doesn’t allow us to finish our own lives this way and declares suicide as an impermissible action.Allah says in Surah al-Nisa 4:29, 4:30
“Don’t kill yourself. No doubt Allah is merciful and anyone who does so, will be pushed in fire. And it is easy for Allah.”
Life is an expedition which is a mixture of hardships and prosperity. It endows us with the opportunity to live it anyway.It’s however, natural that amidst us numerous people get depressed due to these hardships at one point of this expedition or another. Reasons could be family problems (generation gap), personal issues(unsupervised teenage years),financial insecurity, marital conundrums (late marriages, divorce,broken engagement), educational issues (exam/result phobia), unemployment or miss use of mobile phones, social media and internet etc. Unfortunately, the person who is suicidal,frequently thinks that life treats them nastily and this life should be over. At this juncture, they become highly disheartened and consider suicide is the permanent solution to their temporary problems. Actually, nobody really wants to finish their lives like this, they just don’t know how to cope with their problems and how to eliminate the discomfort and agony from their lives, they are going through.
Many of us experience such kinds of feelings and emotions in our lives when we think that this should be the end. The point which really matters here is that feeling suicidal has nothing to do with the person’s character imperfection, and neither it declares them weak and senseless.
It only means that a person has enough pain to endure and it is very difficult for them to manage the situation accordingly.In spite of being desperate, we have to believe strongly that the time will pass anyway and with the passage of time,the suicidal emotions become lessen. We need to control the situation wisely and passionately because it is a distinct property of time that it never stops either it is the state of happiness or grief. Though, it doesn’t matter how intense the pain you are undergoing is now, and how much depressed you are?Because you are not alone in this world who is going through this state. Some of the most honorable, successful, well-known and talented people have been where you are right now.They prefer to take their own lives to get rid of all the evil circumstances. But here we need to pay heed towards the solutions of the problems rather. Because every problem has a solution.
If we indulged by the feelings like helplessness, hopelessness and darkness etc, at the moment we should try our level best to avoid these negative feelings, because there are many people in our surroundings who really care for us. Clark in 2001 stated that “The person who completes suicide dies once. Those left behind die a thousand deaths, trying to relive those terrible moments and understand … Why?”
It is extremely difficult to recover from the death of our beloved ones, but it is harder to endure if the loved one got a suicidal attempt. Because a person who kills himself or herself dies only once but every individual related to the person will be affected innumerable times in their lives. The suicidal act leaves terrible outcomes, by dispatching unstoppable pain, grief, guilt, shame and deep depression amidst the survivors. This emotional instability of the survivors that they couldn’t have done something for their loved one probably leads them to another suicidal act and this process never ends. Remember the survivor could be your helpless father, your poor mother, brothers and sisters. You have to know these are the people who need you the most in this world.
Please don’t take your charm from the world because you are charming, you are beautiful, you are unique, and your existence matters a lot to this world. Give value to your own existence and kick away the negativity from your lives. The darkness of the world is not enough to scare you, because you are brave enough.There are places waiting for you to bring change. Open your eyes, shake your mind, and have a strong faith in your Creator and try to find out the door which is apparently disappeared from your sights but it really exists.Once Helen Keller said, “When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long as the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.”So,don’t kill yourself because it’s always too early to quit.
In order to overcome this issue, we urgently need mental health awareness programs and institutes where psychologists, psychiatrist and counselors would be available for 24 hours. Besides, everyone who is a part of the society need to play their functional role in this regard.